I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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