In the future we'll all be gay
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
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