I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
