I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
