Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.