I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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