Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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