ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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