I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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