Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
