Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
