You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
