yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
