id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
