You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
