wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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