The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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