I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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