Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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