Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
