does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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