dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
