It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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