I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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