I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
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Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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