Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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