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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.

  Fav 23 3594 1807

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?

  Fav 5 2976 1280

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• (646): View more from New York

  He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone

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• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (601): View more from Mississippi

  K. On the way. I need a drink.

  (904): View more from Florida

  Like a drink drink or like water?

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Have we met?

  Fav 10 6628 1368

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?

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• (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds

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• 

  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.

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• (716): View more from New York

  Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.

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