Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle