Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.

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(440): View more from Ohio

he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously

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(518): View more from New York

i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(732): View more from New Jersey

His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'

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(785): View more from Kansas

Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok

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(509): View more from Washington

first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"

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(850): View more from Florida

and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B

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