MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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