i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
