You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
