Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
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Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
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i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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