I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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