She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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