I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
