No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize
