hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
