Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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