Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
