Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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