which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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