I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
