Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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