Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
