kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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