he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Randomize
