chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
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