i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I didn't notice because vodka
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
