So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
