weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Dating After Heartbreak
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.