Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
hahahahaha turkey breast
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap