You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
