I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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