I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
