We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
