Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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